Thursday, January 16, 2014

Seth Godin Will Marry Me: A 52-Week Dating Challenge

(from chicagotribune.com
by Tracie Hitz)

"I may do a lot of stupid shit, but I'm still a lot closer to love than you are."

This is one of my favorite lines in the movie "He's Just Not That Into You". I actually took away quite a few tidbits from this chick flick, which is when I realized this movie started as a book. I read a lot, but mostly marketing books. I haven't read many dating books, unless you count Tucker Max's "I Hope They Serve Beer In Hell" or Chelsea Handler's "My Horizontal Life". Actually, reading Tucker Max's book is a great conversation starter when you're out and about. Everybody has an opinion about that guy.

Instead, I've been taking my marketing knowledge and applying it to dating. Narrowing my target market, perfecting my elevator pitch, advertising online, going on TV and much more. And then a friend suggested I start taking advice from dating books. After all, aren't the authors the real experts?

Maybe, but I think their advice will be similar to what I've taken away from the marketing books. Challenge accepted. Well, technically she didn't challenge me to anything, so I decided to create one. Every month this year, I will read a dating book. Every week, I will find a piece of advice and then look for a matching tip in one of Seth Godin's marketing books to then apply it to my dating lifestyle. Who wouldn't turn to this guy for love advice?

So this month, my dating book will be "He's Just Not That Into You". That quote above is said to a guy that is afraid to put himself out there. This is similar to Godin's book "Linchpin" where he says "Ship despite the lizard brain". The Lizard Brain is our resistance to take a chance, an overwhelming desire to be safe. We want to know for sure that something is going to work before we try it. We spend too much time trying to make it perfect that we rarely go through with anything.

That started to sound familiar with my experience on eHarmony. The process is so lengthy that by the time we get to the texting or phone calls, I've usually ruled them out. I find things that make me think a date will be a waste of time, like the guy texting about taking me to a strip club or the one giving me the play-by-play of his cats' day. Okay, I probably made the right call on those two.

But I'm not perfect, so I can't expect others to be, so I agreed to a date tomorrow night with an eHarmony fella that I've been in contact with for a few weeks. It's time to ship it. Time to do some stupid shit.

I'll be posting updates here, but if you want to follow along in real time over the next 52 weeks, check out #HitzAndMrs as I track this dating experiment. So maybe you're thinking, Tracie, what if you meet the man of your dreams tomorrow? I love your optimism, but let's worry about that if the time comes.

If you have another dating book you think I should read this year, let me know. Each month is a new book of inspiration, so I'd love to hear which books have worked for you. Are you afraid to ship? Or is it easy for you to put yourself out there? Have dating books helped you meet someone?

Follow Hitz & Mrs on Twitter (@HitzAndMrs), Facebook or subscribe via email. Or check out some of the short stories from my long dating life.