SHAKESPEARE CHARACTERS, RANKED BY LULU SCORE

(from thenewyorker.com
by Caitlin Kelly)

On Lulu, women can rate men in categories.… The hashtags are used to calculate a score generated by Lulu, ranging from 1 to 10.

Romeo: 9.9

#OneWomanMan, #BelievesInLove, #WillSeeRomComs, #LoverNotAFighter, #SmellsAmazeballs, #WritesLoveSongs, #Unicorn, #KissableLips, #SnuggleMachine, #LooksHotAllTheTime, #PerfectionSquared, #AmazingCuddles, #PleaseF**kMeILoveYou, #WatchesSunsets, #HopelessRomantic

Prince Hal: 9.2

#CaptainFun, #TrustFundBaby, #CharmedMyPantsOff, #WanderingEye, #HoldsHisLiquor, #WorkInProgress, #EnergizerBunny, #ManChild, #TooCoolForSchool, #CleansUpGood

Mercutio: 8.7

#LifeOfTheParty, #GlassHalfFull, #SexualPanther, #HotFriends, #TemperTantrums, #GetsInFights

Antonio: 8.5

#TrueFriend, #OneOfTheGoodOnes, #Trustworthy, #CalmAndCollected, #ForgotHisWallet, #NoEdge, #FriendZone

Puck: 7.9

#WillActSilly, #Mysterious, #GoneByMorning, #MakesMeLaugh, #TribalTat

Claudius: 6.8

#SilverFox, #MothersLoveHim, #DudeCanCook

Orsino: 6.5

#NotADick, #StillLovesHisEx, #CantTakeAHint, #NotTheSharpestKnife, #Stage5Clinger

Hamlet 6.2

#Rebel, #GlassHalfEmpty, #HotNCold, #CanTalkToMyDad, #SelfAbsorbed, #NeverRemembersMe, #ObsessedWithHisMom, #NoCar

Othello: 5.9

#ForeignFox, #SelfMadeMan, #TallDarkAndHandsome, #LoserFriends, #TrustIssues, #StrongHands, #World’sWorstMassages

Laertes: 5.4

#LovesHisFamily, #NeverAsksQuestions, #GlobeTrotter, #Doesn’tPlayNiceWithMyFriends, #Meh

Petruchio: 4.3

#WillHelpYouMove, #Man’sMan, #CheaperThanABigMac, #RudeToWaiters, #50ShadesOfF**kedUp

Macbeth: 3.9

#ManInUniform, #GreatListener, #WorkEthic, #OneTrackMind, #BitchyExes, #CrayCray, #NoStyle, #Germaphobic

Falstaff: 3.6

#HoldsHisLiquor, #SmokesLikeAChimney, #SwearsLikeASailor, #StripClubVIP, #DirtyTalkPro

Richard III: 2.9

#AlwaysPays, #NapoleonComplex, #TotalF**kingDickhead

Iago: 1.3

#JekyllAndHyde, #DrinksTheHaterade, #ShouldComeWithAWarning, #BlockHisNumber, #LiarLiarPantsOnFire

*All the hashtags used here are actually generated by the Lulu app.

Photograph: Universal History Archive/Getty.

*note-ranking fictional characters? Wonders never cease. I found this amusing. And now I am wondering about other rankings.